Creatures of the Night....

what nature of demon

lies serpentine behind your orbs?

Holding horrors that I might only dream of

and give thanks

to not be out in hell at night

fighting the lessers that grab

at throats of babes

and tear between legs of maidens

Chicken Parm w/Broccoli

This was the dinner we just got done having; tender chicken breast covered in mozzarella cheese, angel hair pasta with a special sauce cooked up by the bf, and some crisp broccoli.

Food Love Diaries #1 (not in chronological order!)

Here's the first of many food pics that I will be putting up. I started a foodie blog
This one is the plate of duck I had when my lover took me to Kyoto. Oh my dear Lord, it was an amazing, scrumptious time! I loved the atmosphere, low lighting, soft music, well-dressed waitstaff scurrying around. It had a touch of magic to it!
We had sushi for an appetizer, and it was the very first time I have thoroughly enjoyed sushi. It had never been that appealing to me before. Oh, and we also tried pot stickers (I know, funny name) - omg, I fell In love with these. The ones you can find in your local grocer aisle aren't bad, try them!
It was my first time having duck, and that particular plate was so tender, a little fatty, and seasoned beautifully.
I highly recommend Kyoto Steakhouse, on Erie Blvd, Syracuse NY.
It also helps if you have a very sexy dining companion ;)
KR

Food Love Diaries #2

I was not a steak girl before I met him. I would go years in between having steak, because it just didn't excite me. I preferred burgers- I want that bread-major CarboLoader here!
But then this guy walks into my life, and cooks me some amazing meat, perfectly seasoned and at the tenderness that makes the animal in me HOWL!
And I ain't never looked back.
Meal pictured: Steak, green beans, and barley with corn.

Food Love Diaries #3

We try to keep our diet as balanced as possible.
This was one of our lighter meals, but it was still delicious and filling.
We eat a lot of broccoli & cauliflower, for those antioxidant boosts! (Did you know if you're on anti-coagulation meds, you can't eat broccoli b/c it interferes with it? Tells ya something about it, doesn't it?)

Meal pictured: chicken breast seasoned with salt, pepper, lime, hot pepper, & steamed broccoli & cauliflower seasoned with salt and pepper.

Temet Nosce

For all its wonderment and abilities, the human brain can be so lacking in this one thing called common sense.
For a quick example, go jump in your car and drive around for a bit. Guaranteed that you will come across not one, but several drivers whom have no idea what they’re doing behind the wheel.
I am currently a part of a sub culture–the dark, devious cutthroat micro universe of exotic dancing.
There are some great parts to this subculture–I’ve met some of the most creative, open-minded, hilarious people ever. I’ve been helped out by members of that strange family when I really needed it, generosity that I will never forget. I’ve had crazy adventures with sexy women, partied with the pros in the game of chance.
But seriously, what do you think of when you hear the word ‘stripper’? My guess is that there are some unappetizing thoughts that go through your mind.
Those typical stereotypes that just rolled through your mind- unfortunately, there are plenty of women that fit and swell the bill.
I will probably come off as arrogant and bombastic throughout the rest of this piece, but if I may profess-I approach the topic with frustration of wanting people to do better for themselves.
One key component of this particular subculture, unfortunately, is dysfunction. This industry is ripe full of people who cannot do one simple thing: get the fuck out of their own way.
I speak out of experience, trust–I’ve had less than desirable relationships (who hasnt?), I’ve had to move in with a friend in the middle of the ghetto, and I put up with shit longer than I should have.
Don’t get me wrong- it’s not like I’m sitting in a mansion now, with butlers bringing me hot water to soak my feet in (although that would be sweet). I’ve still got a long ways to go before I’m comfortable with where I am in life.
That is called progress. And that is what everyone should be trying to do in life. Whether it be a noun or a verb, it needs to happen. Stasis is progress’ evil uncle, out to destroy its name. Everyday that I go to work, I see examples of the latter. And I get it–most of them came from shitty, abusive, neglectful destitute backgrounds, and it’s all they’ve ever known. They’ve never had good role models, or enough discipline. To a degree, it’s a comfort to be surrounded by the shit you’ve always had in your life.
However–one would hope that a human being would instinctively know that they should try to break free. Do better for themselves than their predecessors did. To take those years of watching poverty beat down their caretaker and use it as fuel to get out of their circumstances. To recognize, through instinct, what was unhealthy in their life, and throw it out. To recognize that it’s just dragging them down, and defeating their chance of success. Isn’t that what we’re all in this for? Success in some form, whether it be success in marriage, child-rearing, career, happiness.
WTF.
Ok, I’ll stop preaching.
K

Thank Fuck its Friday

Long week. But, a successful one!
I have been working on my freelancing, building up my writing portfolio. A trial article I wrote for a fashion magazine was well received and they’ve brought me on board of their writing team, with two articles a week needed. Writing about fashion, especially independent/indie designers? No problem! They’re in the middle of re-launching, so once everything’s up and running, I’ll showcase it!
If I can land one more writing job, then I can shut down the dancing to a minimum. Money’s shit there anyway, so I’m pretty close to saying fuck it as it is. I wish I had a magic ball that could tell me if a shift is going to be worth it or not
And I have so much homework to do this weekend, not cool. I’m so impatient for the end of this educational nonsense. Bahumbug!!
p.s. Once school is done, I’m going to be incorporating foodie elements in here. I eat a lot of bangin’ ass food, thanks to my amazing boyfriend. Occasionally I pull some extraordinary flavors onto the dinner table, but 80% is him.

Split Life

I took Monday and Tuesday of this week to work on the freelance side of things. I sent out a bunch of writing applications Thurs-Sat, and got a couple of promising responses by Sunday night. I filled out one more today, now just waiting to hear back.
I’ve got some catching up to do with school, my head has not been in the game. Sooo very close to the end, and I’m mentally vacated. I’ve left some brains around in my skull to finish the job, just a matter of taking a deep breath, and getting through it. It’s going to feel so good to cross that item off my Things to Finish list! ”
The desperation to get out of dancing, and leave that whole crazy, dysfunctional lifestyle and everyone involved behind burns like a fire at my back. It’s a good heat though, keeps me motivated.
I love the thought of getting paid by the words that I put down on paper (Even if I might not get the byline) but at the same time, I long for a regular paycheck. What that must be like, to plan out how much you are going to make in a month because you know.
I was happy to see via Syracuse.com that the “building with the house on the roof” the one on the corner of Hiawatha and N. Salina (the newspaper had different streets, but I think mine fit) is going to get renovated.  A former trucking company owner, Yiorgos Kyriakopoulos bought it for $200,00 and plans on making commercial space on the bottom, and apartments on the top floors. He might turn the “House” (which is really just a cover for the mechanical parts of the freight elevator that runs through the building) into his office.
This is a pretty awesome happening in our city that needs as much help as it can get. I wish more of the abandoned factories that are sprinkled throughout the city would have more investors and innovators.

The Written Word, my Old Lover (originally written 6/08/13)

While I was doing the dishes this morning, I was thinking about writing. Yesterday, while I was at work, my brain seemed to have settled on the word ‘subculture’. And there it was– the bittersweet niche of inappropriateness & debauchery that I could relocate to and set up shop.
With the topic of subculture, I feel like I put enough distance between myself and the parts of my life that I’m trying to distance myself from. Yet, I am never going to be normal, or snuff out my crazy flare-ups. (Perhaps I like the term “flare-ups of crazy” better, the latter sounds like a venereal disease, haha. )
I’ve been a fickle writer the last five years, at best.  A few years after starting to dance, the creative well seemed to lose its source of nutrients….too many distractions, a little bit of experimenting with drugs, being in a shitty relationship, having too lax of a lifestyle.
Struggling with anxiety and bouts of depression the last couple of years didn’t help matters either.
Well, maybe it was just the majority of my 20s, and all the self-discovery and trial-and-error that everyone goes through. I’m currently working on an essay about how much better 27 is than 21. Like, for real.
In any case, I feel like I’m finally starting to wake up. I’m ready to, I no longer need to keep my head buried in the sand and stay numb to block out reality.
Maybe that’s it- it’s impossible for me to create alternate realities if my own isn’t comfortable. And throw in a bit of don’t-give-a-shit-what-anyone-thinks-about-my-words, which also comes in your later 20s (if you’re lucky )
Peace & Chickengrease, y’all,
Kelly

Spring Sleepiness

Good morning
It’s a shitty rainy day outside, but it’s Thursday- one day away from the weekend. I have to make this post quick b/c I’m supposed to be studying for a Spanish quiz. This summer session runs for 4 weeks only, so it’s pretty intense. The teacher is super cool though, and funny. Thank God- it’s awful having a crappy teacher for an intense course.
I also have Black American Literature online class that runs till August. After that–I will be done!! Definitely done with academia for a long break, I might go back someday. If I’m anything like my mother, I might take it to Masters level. However….she went there, and never really ended up using it. What’s she doing now? Shoveling cow shit. Not that there’s anything wrong with that–frankly, she loves it. Hell, those that know me know that I love it as well. Like mother, like daughter. I thought I’d be the one to run away with a farmer, but she beat me to it.
I can’t wait to be done with school. Finishing some hurdles this season that have been plaguing me for a while– finished my divorce last week, only took me two years. Who knew a break so seemingly simple would require so much paperwork and tears of frustration? Man, he was so crazy after I left his ass. When I notified him that our marriage was totally kaput, he texted me a very sweet goodbye letter. At least he’s aware of all that I did for him.
Graduation will be the next hurdle. On the one hand, I know that I really wouldn’t have gotten done with it any sooner than I did, but half of me wishes I had discarded the crap and crappy relationships sooner and battened down the hatches and got it done.
However….life runs its course, and sometimes you get it right, but a lot of the time you get it wrong. or just life interferes and doesn’t let you do it right.
Well, I say fuck all that. I look around my current life, and I love it. I’m in such a good place, in an amazing relationship that has done so much for me. There was one person (who will read this, and will know I’m talking about him) who mentioned a couple months ago that I seem to let my relationships interfere with my own personal goals. And he was absolutely right, I did let the shitty relationships interfere way more than they should have, but all in all, I don’t totally regret them. If I could go back….well, what’s the use of going there? I am still young, and I’ve finally found the right island to set up base camp at. Every person on the planet has his own learning experiences and I’ve been lucky with mine. Yes, there is a failed marriage in the mix, but that was my own choice, and NO KIDS!!!! I win
Be back later, fuckers.
K

ExCaliber (originally written 5/12/13)

I came through and cleaned this literary house; I should be studying for finals but I’ve been itching to get some writing done.
Friday was the first day of the speaking (I was going to put ‘oral’ but we all know how my dirty mind is) part of my Spanish final. I did much better than my partner, who did zero prep-work and apparently no studying. I’m pretty sure I’m doing everything in life better than she is. I suspect she is a meth addict, seen enough of the symptoms, I work with enough of its slaves.
When I got home, my boyfriend and I took off for my mom’s farm, which is downstate some 2 1/2 hours. Beautiful drive, and the weather wasn’t too horrible. We made sure to pick up rubber boots before we left; you know ain’t afraid of some slop
I love cows, they’re amazing animals. I know it sounds weird, but I love how they smell- I love the smell of cowshit, and the way their hair smells (yes, they have hair, not fur) and even how their breath smells. Mmmm….rumination! They’re such good animals–they give so much of themselves, and we use so much of them. The modern dairy cow has a shitty short life, I wish all bovines could be raised out of pasture doing their cow thing.
Our dinner was completely homegrown or it was locally produced. The hamburger we enjoyed was one of theirs that they had slaughtered. The potatoes were ones they had grown last summer, and the asparagus was fresh (although not nearly as tasty as the way my bf cooks it) .
We stayed overnight at an ugly, overpriced hotel, but we had a fun night We went back over to the farm for a hearty breakfast and to feed treats to the hairy beasts up on the hill. I got my hand stuck in a cows mouth and had to yank it out. I forgot they had bottom teeth
Said our goodbyes before noon and hit the road; close to Rochester we stopped at a Nick Roussos for a Garbage Plate- new experience for me. Very interesting, different eatery. I had the white hot plate, which was two coneys over mac salad and potatos. MMmmm….carb overload
The final stop was to pick up his mom and the three of us traveled to the Lilac Festival (which is going on all weekend–go check it out!) . Lilacs are my favorite all time flower, and they have such a short blooming period This park is so beautiful, and there’s over 500 varieties scattered all over, among other ancient unusual trees.
I am so happy that we got to go, I’ve been wanting to go for years now. Guess it took just being with the right person
K